Page 79 - March2014

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and probably doesn’t exist anyway. After you get to know
yourself today, update the vision of your ideal partner for
this stage in your life. Dump the chemistry crap and look for
a man who will be a great partner; not just a great date.
3. Clear the cobwebs. Get clarity on what old stuff may be
getting in your way. Your new guy should not have to pay
for all the jerks, mistakes and bad relationships you’ve had
in your past. Also, define and then dump those voices that
have been hanging around since you were a teenager.
They’ve been holding you back and getting in your way of
finding love. Only then can you bring your best self to this
stage of your dating life.
4. Be a real lady. Embrace your femininity. Always
show kindness and compassion to yourself and
the men you meet. Remember, too, that the
good guys – the relationship minded “alpha
guys” – want their woman to receive gra-
ciously… so be that woman. Bring your
softness to your dating experience along
with all of your accomplishments and suc-
cesses. (Your softness is your strength,
sister.)
5. Play easy-to-get for the right
man. That story about guys loving
to chase is about boys and their
egos; it’s not about mature and
accomplished men. These guys
don’t stick around for games or
manipulation. Let a man know
when you enjoy him and he
makes you happy. Don’t
make him guess too long
or you’ll be waiting for a
phone that will never
ring.
DON’T:
1. See
only
in black or white. Not only are your hair roots gray…. you
now hopefully know that most of life falls into some gray
zone. That is especially true of interactions and relation-
ships with men. There doesn’t have to be a good and bad
or yes or no. Bring your rich life experience and a rational
perspective into your dating. Be open to people’s stories
and differences and see how many wonderful men are re-
ally out there!
2. Think you can do the same things and get different
results. Going after the same guys in the same way will
not get you any further than where you are right now. Keep
learning about yourself and about men, and see how your
dating experience vastly improves.
3. Rely on intuition. Staying in touch with your feminin-
ity doesn’t mean relying on intuition. This is so often an
excuse for making rash decisions based on silly stuff. Take
your time and use your head. This is what grownup dating
is all about: balancing your head and heart so you make
good decisions. Try it-- you’ll like it.
4. Wait to run into him. You’re reading this so I know he
hasn’t shown up on your doorstep. Part of your challenge
at this age is that men no longer appear in your life; you
actually have to create opportunities to meet them. Get out
of the house, get online and tell everyone you know you’re
looking for a good man. Make your wish come true.
5. Give up! I became a first time bride at 47 and I’m living a
magnificent life with the man of my dreams. If I had a dime
for every time I wanted to give up I’d be rich and single. If
you want the love of a good man, do everything you can
to make it happen. I can tell you from experience, every
boring date, lonely Friday night and insecure moment is
worth it. Being in love
and being loved is
really cool.