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love hav-
ing sex with my partner, she
says she enjoys it too, but
I realize my penis is very
small. Does size matter?
JC Alcantara
Hi JC,
There are a lot of factors that go
into this answer, and know that it is
not exactly a “yes” or “no” question.
First off, you say that your partner
says she enjoys having sex with
you—if she says she enjoys it, and
you believe that she means it, should
size matter to you? If so, try to think
of why you are not content with your
own size. Is it because you are com-
paring yourself to media representa-
tions of what other men look like, a
“standard” size that you’ve heard of,
or perhaps even previous criticism
CAITLIN ROSS-POTEET
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from a previous partner? We are all
made differently, and even though
it is normal to feel insecure and to
compare ourselves to others, there
comes a point at which this sort of
thinking can interfere with our hap-
piness and our livelihoods, and it is
better to just try and accept ourselves
as we are. There is a lot of pressure
in our culture on men to be very well-
endowed, but the truth of the matter
is that the large majority of men do
not look like men in adult films, and
males models’ “packages are often
enhanced in one way or another
underwear or swimwear campaigns
for many of the same reasons
women’s breasts are enhanced in
such campaigns. Also, remember
that if you are comparing yourself to
adult actors at all, even if their size is
real and the sex is real, a lot of what
we see in porn is not. It is highly
dramatized and embellished, and
just because a female adult actress
appears to be getting pleasure from
an above average man, it does not
mean she actually is, and it does not
mean only larger men are capable
of giving pleasure in real life either. If
that were the case, a lot of men and
women would be very dissatisfied.
Additionally, if you have received
previous criticism from a previous
partner, you should realize that this
person probably has insecurities of
her own and was being extremely
insensitive to you as a person, so try
not to take it to heart.
Now, if you do not believe your
current partner is being honest with
you, perhaps you should explore
why that is. It might be that this issue
is not just about how you personally
I
SEPTEMBER 2012 -
SEXY X2
MAGAZINE -
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