

Now it’s possible to provide
direct clitoral stimulation during
intercourse. In doggy style,
the man can reach around. Or
in the woman-on-top position,
she can masturbate or he can
place a fist on his abdomen
and she can lean into it. But the
way most couples make love,
intercourse does not provide
sufficient stimulation for women
to enjoy orgasms, a big reason
why sex without intercourse can
feel so satisfying.
Meanwhile, for women who
enjoy feeling filled up, dildos
and phallic vibrators can be
godsends. The woman can use
them on herself with the man
watching, or holding and gently
caressing her. Or the woman
can coach the man about how
she likes things inserted. Most
women prefer toys and their
vaginas to be well lubricated be-
fore slow, gentle introduction. Or
the man might use a strap-on
dildo for more of an intercourse
feel. Sex toy marketers offer
dildos, vibrators, and strap-ons.
Great Sex for Life
For those who think “sex” is
the old in-and-out, it can be a
challenge to discover the joys
of great sex without intercourse.
But lovemaking without inter-
course can be a marvelous
alternative for lovers of any age
who have trouble doing it like
they do in movies.
For individualized help coping
with problematic intercourse or
age-related sexual changes,
consult a sex therapist. To find
one near you, visit the Amer-
ican Association of Sexuality
Educators, Counselors, and
Therapists, the Society for Sex
Therapy and Research, or
the American Board of
Sexology.